23 January 2012

18th bunch of strange confessions, weird questions & crazy narrations

dedicated to fools & mavericks of any kind ...

---

I find my ticket
For a game of cricket
To be but wicked

I tried to lick it
And - unable to stick it -
I know it's wicked

But I love cricket :
How to get a new ticket
Not at all wicked ?

I have no money
Because I must buy honey
For my sweet bunny

I cannot forge it
As - having no proper kit -
I'll never make it ...

---

A tiny spilled bean
Has got a tremendous spleen
For being unclean.

To wash up himself
He consulted an old elf
From the upper shelf.

But the silly elf
Cannot even wash himself
Though he's over twelve.

A skillful marine
Means that the washing machine
Makes everything clean

So the unclean bean
Washes up in the machine
But remains unclean ...

---

A failed politician
Became a bad physician
And worse musician

He does not know it
Because of his infirm wit
He tends to blow it

He thinks he is good
So he plays his ancient oud
Always in good mood

---

A rose of jelly
Makes it big in the telly
Showing her belly.

Her grumpy husband
Who plays guitar in a band
Says she should mend.

She thinks he's but fool
Who was never really cool
Since leaving his school

Their fierce arguments
Are full of bad sentiments
Without compliments

Marriage splits apart
Both of them being too smart.
Spoiled it from the start ...

---

My testosterone
Makes of me a lazy drone
Lusty and rape-prone.

Getting rid of it
May damage my male outfit
And that's quite unfit.

So I must tolerate
But not at all saturate
Its high mischief rate ...

---

A long shuck of corn
Makes it really big in  porn
Which brings him much scorn

He is rather coarse
feels no remorse
For his current course

And his third wife
Sees no harm in such a life
Full of daily strife

---

Donald the Drake
Trod upon his garden rake
Causing it to break

He loved so his rake
To be likely to break
Or drown in the lake

His wife Daisy
Thinks he is downright crazy
And of course lazy

---

A self-assured wart
Despises all kinds of art
As not enough smart

But he likes each chart
For he deems them all as art
Which is indeed smart

---

An unfaithful mouse
Sinning in the slaughterhouse
Cheats his faithful spouse

His bigot girlfriend
Doesn't like such a shameful trend
Saying it must end

He knows that of course
The Church won't grant him divorce
To end his ill course

Only solution
Is the priest's absolution
By resolution ...

---

A huge capricorn
Wants to embellish each horn
With three cards of porn

His wife doesn't like it
As such a shameful kit
Must not be naked

---

A nice unicorn
Damaged his beautiful horn
Digging up some corn

But a weird pundit
Promises him to mend it
Having the proper kit

He is known to master
All kinds of glue and plaster
To the right cluster

Indeed he did it
But he warns it might be split
If violently hit

Thus the unicorn
Is now cautious with his horn
And doesn't dig up corn

---

My botched creation
Is poor incorporation
Of Lord's intention

His inspiratiom
May be in expiration
Past long duration ...

---

A bottle of stale ale
With hoarse-voiced nightingale
Like together wail

They wail that they fail
They wail for ungranted bail
And for distant gale

They wail they can't hail
And also for rusty nail
They wail for lost mail

They wail for holed pail
And also for being male
Without a female

They wail they are pale
And also for shameful sale
They wail for killed snail

They wail for torn sail
And also for crooked rail
They wail for cut tail

They wail for dead whale
For being hoarse-voiced and stale
They wail for lost tale

Who will drink  that ale
And chase off that nightingale
To end their ill wail ?

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